A Dose of Fear Factor

Next to snakes, going to the dentist really freaks me out. For one, I hate the drilling sound. Second, I hate the cleaning routine because my teeth are so sensitive. Third, I just really really really hate the sound of the drilling! What I like though is how I somewhat made conversation with my dentist with out uttering a word.

I. Start
Dentist: Ok, I'm going to start. Remember it's just the sound k?
Me: (Mouth wide open) UHU
after 10 minutes...
Dentist: *laughing under her mask
Me: (while mouth was still wide open) waaay? (translation: What?)
Dentist: YOUR FACE! parang TRANSFORMER!
Me: (still mouth wide open) *laughing aaaahhaaaa? (translation: talaga?)
Dentist: Oo!

II. Middle after about an hour or so... that's what I get for not regularly facing my fear!
Dentist: At least we're almost done with the upper part.
Me: UGH... pero sige lets finish it na Doc!
Dentist: (after 15 minutes) pati pag manual ha... YOUR FACE!
Me: (mouth slightly open) Waaaa? (translation: what?)
Dentist: Transformer pa ren! hahaha!
Me: (mouth slightly open) Dok, nee uu ngakek. Ayaaii o eenis (translation: Doc, next to snakes ayaw ko dentist)
Dentist: Nako, baka awayin mo na ako. Mag second sitting nalang tayo next week?
Me: (mouth STILL slightly open) aaa i o aaai! (translation: Wag, di ako babalik dito!)

III. Crossing the finish line! after almost 2 hours! hahahaha!
Dentist: We have to finally take your upper right molar and your lower left molar out next week.
Me: (Before opening my mouth wide again) Pwedeng extra dose of anesthesia pllleeeaaasssee??
Dentist: Open mouth please, let me add the filler na.
Me: (mouth open) hahahahahahahahaha!
Dentist asst.: Sige Ma'am idaan mo nalang sa tawa!
Me: (mouth still open) HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
Dentist: You want anesthesia na?
Me: (mouth still open) oooooo! (translation: no)
Dentist: Next week ha, we really have to get your molars out
Me: (mouth still open) hahahahahaha! ii reak u ii aaa oaars (translation: I'll break-up with my molars)
Dentist: Hahahaha! panalo! :)

Children Say

During the Entrepreneurial Day in Poveda, I met new awesome gradeschoolers and Highschoolers that enlarged my heart with happiness because of all the nice stories I've shared with them. I shamelessly admitted my age and that even at 30, I still love watching Disney Channel especially Phineas and Ferb and now the new Disney series Fish Hooks. I loved hearing their comments of our best selling Tapa! Here are a series of conversations that I remember with some of them:

I.
Grade 4 student: Are you a chef?
Me: No I'm not, I'm a businesswoman.
Grade 4 student: But you like to cook?
Me: Yes I do.
Me: Do you know how to cook?
Grade 4 student: Yes I do. My Yaya has to watch me when I'm in the kitchen so that I'm safe.
Me: That's nice! So would you want to be a chef when you grow up?
Grade 4 student: Maybe...I think so.
Me: Wow, that's so cool that you know what you want to do when you grow up.
Grade 4 student: I'm so hungry, your tapa smells good- hurry please.
Me: oh ok. Sorry about that!
* after 2 hours, she comes back and orders 2 more :)

II.
A group of sophomores and juniors arrive the booth ALL AT THE SAME TIME :) feeling cool, calm and collected...
Me: Do you guys just want to come back lunch time?
Junior student: Nah, it's ok we can wait- it's just a career talk.
Me: Hey, those talks are important. They help you decide on what school to go to or what field you'd like to take when you go to College.
Junior student: Ms. it's totally ok. When you were here last Spanish day I was late for class too.
Me: Oh my gosh! come back lunch time!
Junior student: Pllleeeaaasseee giivvvee mee taaapppaaaa!
Me: LUNCH TIME :)
*She came back with 4 of her friends and they all ended up buying their lunch from me.

III.
A couple of high school kids walked by...
student: OMG...that smells so good!
student 2: stop it! remember our diet!
me: You probably are Juniors?
both students: YES!
me: Is prom coming up soon?
both students: NEXT WEEK!!!
me: ooohhhh...You know, you should reward yourselves since it's a Friday and cheat days are usually during the weekends!
both students: NOOOO!!!
me: Ok then :)
both students: sige na nga, Ms. can we buy!
*HAHAHAHA!

IV.
Before packing up to leave, a group of grade 4 and 5 students come back to the booth (most of them already ordered their recess and lunch from me...I love them! :) )
Grade 4 student: Ms. Your tapa really smells so good! I want to buy again but I'm so full na!
me: I think you are sweetie, didn't you just eat it for recess and lunch?
Grade 4 student: it's ok, we have training later and we have to eat a lot before training.
Grade 5 student: yes, we're all in the JUNIOR HARD COURT TEAM.
me: WOW, there's a Junior Hardcourt team?
all girls in unison: YES
Grade 4 student: Can I get your calling card?
me: sure you can!
Grade 4 student: I am so going to tell my Mom to call you when I have a party. Please cater, only tapa k?
Me (plus wide eyes and totally hiding my kilig laugh): Sure sweetie!
Grade 5 student: That would be cool! a tapa party! everything tapa!
another grade 5 student: So, you do this all the time? sell tapa? isn't it messy and you smell like tapa the whole day?
me: Oh yeah, I smell like tapa the whole day and my hands are mostly sticky and they also smell like tapa but if you like and love what you do- you won't mind at all.
grade 5 student: See, we can do this when we're done with school!
me: yes you can :)
* It's awesome how kids now a days are smarter and more sensitive to what ever their surroundings are. I guess it's just learning how to listen to them more to know how to understand them.

Keeping my Sister's Memories

It's been years. I was 6-years old when my sister died so prior to turning 6, things were just a blur to me. My childhood was wonderful, I'd like to think at such a young age the color of my life growing up was rich. I was watching "My Sister's Keeper", I couldn't stop crying. It's been 25 years since Charlene's passing, but there are times I feel I've been robbed. Maybe because I was so young, and I always wanted her around since she was the keeper of my peace and I always felt so secure around her no matter how sick she was. Being the eldest she still played her role of making sure we were all ok, and she still took time to care for us.



I watched the movie twice, and it wasn't even from the start- it was more like chopped up. But I still caught myself crying. And in the last part, there was a dialogue that was said: "I'll never understand why Kate had to die and we all got to live. There is no reason for it I guess, death's just death. No body understands it." and then she goes on saying: "the point is, I had a sister and she was fantastic. One day I'm sure I'll see her again, until then- our relationship continues". I guess being older now, I know she can see me and she knows what's happening to me I just wish I can hear from her end. It's the awesome thought of her telling me she's fine (a part of me tells me that I know she is in a better place now) and that I'm doing ok or I'm doing good- I guess the affirmation from an authority and not just any authority but from her specifically because I've always looked up to her. I guess the best way to continue my relationship with her is to keep living my life. You know I love you Manang Charl, always and forever :)

To Whome It May Concern, Here's Closure Served For You

In any downside of a relationship, either party who has been left would always want closure. No matter the situation of the break-up: ugly or mutually agreed on, closure is always at stake. There are some that demand an explanation, having the one-track mind to know and probably even making it their mission in life to know what went wrong or to blame who caused the fall into the relationship. A third party? Falling out of love? How about this: it just really didn't work out. No matter how long you've been together, or how far into the relationship you've been in- it will always be a matter of choice to stick it out or work it out even. But you have to admit, even choice has a shelf-life to those that know they have truly and brutally thought and contemplated on and even painstakingly debated with reason and emotion to end the relationship or continue on. So you've chosen the first, which is to end it.

Take it as a chance, or even think of it as re-birth for yourself. It's time to learn how to live your life and discover yourself once again. It brings out the resiliency that you have never imagined that was in you. Or, it could bring out the coward in you if you choose to make the situation eat you up. You can blame the whole ugly situation on some one else, or directly to the one that you lost. But really, at the end of the day- the relationship was between the two of you. Did you ever stop and think and even look beyond yourself that maybe, just maybe you were part of the problem since the whole relationship consists of two people. If I were in your shoes, I would look into myself. Of course I could hate the whole world, be mad, and probably have an insane streak since I lost the love of my life. Reality bites, and life has still to be lived out since you are still alive. Think of it this way, it was way better now than later on down the road. Where your marriage would have been in shambles and you would have eventually broken your vow with God.

I believe in having the right person come in the right time according to God. I now fully understand what my elders have said time and time again: Don't look for love, it will look for you. If you are truly worth it to the man- he will find ways and means to get to know you, woo you and be with you. A man will always be the hunter and the woman will always be the game. I'm sure, your time will come. Once in my life, I thought a certain guy was the one for me and I came to deciding that he wasn't. We weren't going to work. I couldn't stomach certain things that I knew either I just had to accept every bit of him, and stay miserable forever which felt like I was settling just because we were together for a certain amount of time. I had to be true to myself, so I chose to end it. There's more to life, believe me. So much have gone through hear ache. Maybe it's your time to go through it, to finally and firmly put your faith and trust in your higher power who honestly is the best person to be in a relationship with. Closure is really within your reach, no matter how many years or effort you put into finding an answer that you want, you might never even get. You can find it in you. Close the chapter now, and write a new one.

I wish you all the best. I wish you well even. Life is exciting and go out there and live it. God Bless you always.

Choosing Happiness

2009 was a happening year. I guess I've learned the art of just sucking everything in- good or bad, believe it or not I've been grateful for everything that has come may way. I guess maturity is kicking in. Better late then never right? 'Tis the year to choose to be happy for me. I turn 30 in a couple of days and in all honesty, I'm quite excited. I know I should take a chill pill, so sue me for being way to positive or optimistic. I'm done with feeling the whole I'm-so-sad-and-depressed-birthday-feeling. I've left that with 2009, although I had an awesome celebration in Boracay with 3 closest women I have in my life :) That was the most depressing birthday I ever had though.

Things are starting to unfold...the start of 2010 has been pretty awesome. A little bit bitter-sweet, but I can't complain at all. I truly believe God will never lead nor give me situations that I can't handle. It's now 2010, and things are still unfolding for me. The latest would be my past meeting my now- who would have thought, looking back while concentrating on looking at the now would be such an exciting journey. The best is yet to come I guess, and this maybe just be the formula for me to truly look beyond and finally continue on with living my life, and maybe not forgetting where my now has brought me.

In a couple of days, I mark my 30th year. Big deal right? Age is nothing but a number. But I guess for me, reaching that specific age is some what monumental (I'm so optimistic- I'm not even there yet). Since last year was such a negative roller-coaster ride for me, I know there is no way but up for me since I was down last year. Bring it on LIFE- I'm ready to embrace what ever God and the universe will be giving me this 30th monumental year :)

Discovering Legaspi, Albay

This was supposed to come out in a Travel Magazine. My first contributing piece. Anyway, I don't know what happened. I'd like to thank my cousin Val for being an awesome editor to me :)

Travelling alone to a new place can be a little bit intimidating. When you get there you either explore and get excited over the possibility of new discoveries, or you choose to be safe in the confines of your hotel room and indulge in a good book for some peace and relaxation. Since I was in an adventurous mood, I was feeling ready to visit Legaspi, Albay all on my own. Despite the unfamiliar territory and not knowing anyone from there, I was ready to learn new things, see new places, meet new people and somehow, learn a little more about myself in the process. Little did I know that this trip would bring out my true love for photography and discovery, and in some way redefine my definition of “alone time”.

And I was off! The 55-minute plane ride to Legaspi wasn’t that bad. I love riding airplanes.; they’re fast, there are no traffic jams up in the air, and just the thought of being up, up and away from the ground immediately relaxes me, I always fall asleep even before take-off. Just when we were about to land, I peeped out the window and looked out into the beautiful scenery. Legaspi, here I come!

Truth is, I didn’t know that much about this place, except the fact that the perfectly shaped volcano, Mt. Mayon was somewhere around here. I was told to expect to see some charming old churches and have my fill of Pili nuts, Bicol Express and Laing (both famous dishes from the local cuisine).

I decided to research about my destination and I found out a few things. I found out that there were just so many things to see and do here, so I decided to map out the historic and famous landmarks of Legazpi I would go and see. Of course I didn’t want to just hit the tourist spots, but I had to start somewhere! It is almost like going through a proper coursed meal. Entree first, then main dish then dessert, even in a que sera-sera moment I still like the feeling of being somewhat organized.

First stop: Rizal Shrine

Since he is the national hero of the Philippines, most of the provinces have a shrine or monument dedicated to Jose Rizal. If you ask me, this one looked pretty much the same as the rest of the other monuments dedicated to him. Those that really stand out are the ones in Calamba, Laguna and the Luneta Park in Manila.

Second stop: Headless Monument

This was built and dedicated to the unknown people of Albay who fought in the war during the Japanese occupation. It is Located on Lapu-Lapu St. in Legaspi City, right across the post office, and amidst the hustle and bustle. It acts as a continuing reminder to those around of the heroism of the everyday citizen.

Third stop:

I couldn’t go all the way to Bicol without checking out the majestic Mount Mayon. This incredibly symmetrical volcano may take credit for putting Albay on the map. Currently, it is the Philippines’ most active volcano.

I was brought to the Mayon Skyline where the Mayon Planetarium is located. A nearby café with a couple of adventure sport facilities like, wall climbing, attracted a number of adrenaline junkies and tourists who were taking a rest from their sight-seeing.

Unfortunately, it was a cloudy day, I wasn’t able to see the volcano in all its glory. Nevertheless, the lush scenery that surrounded the area made up for it by providing a calm and serene mood.

On the way down from Mayon Skyline, I asked the driver to pull over a couple of times when I saw possible opportunities to take good photos of Mount Mayon. Despite not being able to take the perfect photo because of the conditions, I was happy to be able to see for myself one of the nominated 7-wonders of the world. I really hope she wins a place.

Fourth Stop: Daraga Church

The Daraga Church is one of the oldest and most historic Baroque Churches in Legaspi. Named Nuestra Seňora de la Portera (Our Lady of the Gate), there are many versions as to how the church came about. Some say that it was built by young maidens, or daraga in the local dialect, after a catastrophic eruption destroyed the town. Apparently, the church was really built by Franciscan missionaries in the year 1773, 40-years before the eruption of Mayon.

As soon as I saw the structure from afar, I was in awe. I’ve always had an unspoken love for old architecture and historic religious sites; churches are at the top of my list. This Church really intrigued me, since I was only allowed to take a peek at what was inside; I couldn’t enter, but I was able to see a glimpse of the interior despite the grid bars that blocked my view. I could see that that day, the church was being set up for a wedding.

Fifth Stop: St. Gregory Cathedral

St. Gregory is the Patron Saint of Albay, so it is fitting that the Cathedral named after him is found at the heart of Legaspi City, near the Peňaranda Park. The cathedral has been renovated to update it from it’s original Spanish style architecture. I chose to hear mass in this church on Saturday night - God spoke to me in Bicolano. Although I couldn’t understand the dialect, I was happy to experience something new.

Sixth Stop Peňaranda Park

The Peňaranda Park is home to the Liberty Bell landmark. This famed bell constructed by Americans on April 1945 symbolizes the liberation of the people of Albay from the Japanese affliction. It’s an ancient bell that is housed in a mini-dome, and the park that was built for it is visited by young and old alike. Unlike most parks that are filled with green fields, this park was mostly concrete with little landscaping. This park is walking distance from the St. Gregory Cathedral, and is the best place to view it. Similar to a plaza or square, the park is centrally located, thus it is easy to spot the Legazpi City Hall, and other buildings connected to the government and business. I noticed that some young locals enjoy using the park as a place to get together and chat with friends.

Seventh and Final Stop : Cagsaua Ruins

The Cagsaua Ruins are remnants of an old Church that was buried due to Mt. Mayon’s explosion in the year 1814. I learned that there was originally a different church built in the same area way back in 1587. However on July 25, 1636, the first church was burned by Dutch citizens who were raiding bordering towns of Legazpi Bay. When I was taking photos, I was reminded of the set of the movie Braveheart. As ironic as it seems, the ruined Church surrounded by wild flowers and grass all around, was a romantic sight. What makes the place even more special is the view of Mt. Mayon that you can see from here. The entrance fee was PHP 10.00.

My adventure had come to an end after 4 short days. It was time for me to head back to Manila but I didn’t go home empty handed. First of all, I now know from personal experience just how beautiful this Filipino province is; something that I’ve heard so many people rave about. The history of the province and the hospitality of the people are mementoes that I will definitely keep close to my heart. Best of all, this trip taught me about more than just my country, but the serenity and peace of Bicol helped me reflect and get to know myself better.

Continuing

Centenial Airport, waiting to board the plane for L.A.(October, 2008)

Getting old is inevitable. What's age really? To the obvious, its just a series of numbers that we go through year after year. Personally, this year was the very first year I truly felt withdrawn, reborn, taking hold of my destiny, facing certain fears, and basically just living my life each day. It was the birthday I felt sleeping through, not a tinge of excitement hit me. It was a countdown that I didn't want showing in my face- why? maybe quarter- life crisis hit me early. Although, looking back at my 28th year, I have come to terms with certain memories I was proud to achieve and of course will never forget.

Travelling has always been an addiction for me. It never mattered how far I was going to go, the mere thought of a road-trip or a boat trip, or my usual plane trips to wherever the destination maybe always has and always will excite me. What was new this time around was the start of being with myself . The comfort of knowing I can and will get through anything in life is now natural to me. Embracing my strength, weakness and longing for what has to come in my life has been a journey that I am aware of, and I'm truly looking forward to living out :)


Centennial Airport to leave for LA (October 2008)

I forgot who once told me, but who ever it was: the year before the 0 is always best to be celebrated and is a lucky year. I wonder if this year is and will be lucky for me. Personally, I believe and feel that luck is so vague. And it doesn't have to do with all positive outcome. I treat every opportunity, every learning experience that I come across with as a state of being in luck all the time. No matter how hard the learning that I have to charge to my own book of experience, I still take it as luck. So sue me for being optimistic, It's just plain gravity right? What comes up, must and will come down and vice-versa.

Laguna Beach, Ca. (October, 2008)


Welcoming my 29th year in Boracay was refreshing. I have so much memories of myself with this mystical island. My first trip to this island was when I was 9. It was still such a virgin. No electricity, just oil lamps in the evening with torches to guide our way back to our cottage in the resort we stayed in. There was only 1 cemented establishment with a generator for the resort to have electricity. Boracay then, up to Boracay now still all good and great memories for me when I would go back. Doesn't matter who I was with, this island is dear to me.

Bantayan Island, Cebu (March 2008)

My birthday get-away for 4 days was purely soul-searching and at the same time recollecting and making my new goals in life that I'd like to achieve. I knew what my past was like, I made the decisions then- I'm currently in my now slowly learning how to live each day to the utmost best I can. I don't know what tomorrow is going to be like for me, but I still look forward to it. My lonely travels have made me gain perspective and have made me learn about myself more to the point I would simply get surprised with myself. I love the fact I can out do myself once in a while, and of course there are moments where I just stay afloat. To continue my journey in life, cheers to more travels and maybe not do all of them alone sometime soon, obviously I'm shamelessly sending it out to the universe and claiming it :)

Boracay Island, Philippines (March 2009)

Approaching the LAX airport (October 2008)